Pumps and prayers...

Sabrina has had to deal with a life-altering illness, Type 1 Diabetes, for just over a year now. I can't say enough how proud I am of her for how she handles it, most of the time. She went from being terrified at immunization time to giving herself her own injections of insulin 4-5 times a day within a matter of weeks. Then, in December, she was changed over to the on-site insulin pump and continuous glucose monitor. This is what has become a major part of her life and ours. All of the equipment and site injections every 3 or so days.
It's something that has spilled over into so many areas and brought so many learning experiences. I think it's made her stronger, and I've been trying to help her understand that it is something she can control...not let it control her. Even McKenna mimics her. She wants to be like big sis...with her own "pump"...
But, last night also came a teaching moment that I tried to take advantage of today. Sabrina was changing her site on her pump, and having a hard time...it was late...she was tired. And, I don't blame her not wanting to stick a 1/2 inch needle straight into her stomach every 3 days. So, after it was done, she came to me crying that Heavenly Father didn't answer her prayer to help her find a good spot that wouldn't hurt. I tried to explain that He loves her, and it is going to hurt anyway...it didn't mean He wasn't answering her prayers.

Then, today in the combined adult meeting at church, the speaker talked exclusively about prayer, about desire, about listening for answers, about doing the right things that will put you in a position to get answers. So, I started thinking again about Sabrina last night.

She definitely had the desire...she even had faith He would help her. So, what I wanted to explain to her (and I brought Hayden in too) was something I still struggle with...giving into His will...not that it's His will that she be in pain. But, that she needs to use her prayers to ask for her own growth and strength to handle these challenges. That we can want something so badly, but it just isn't in the cards, or isn't something we can change...so ask for something we can...like to endure.

I hope that as she gets older she can grow closer to her Heavenly Father and learn to view prayer as shared communication with Him. Not just outlining what we're grateful for, or asking for what we need, but really talking to Him and feeling Him. It's what I hope for-for all of them, and myself as well.

A beautiful Spring day...NOT!

I was ready to sing the praises of Spring...the last week has been getting warmer...mid 40's usually in the day and a few sunny days. You don't see many of those during winter in Germany. So, that means spring is arriving, not to mention the calendar does say the 25th of March. It's really time. What a tease Mother Nature is. Here is what I woke up to today:

Now, in December, January, OK...no problem--bring on the snow...but, March 24th? Really? After 5 of these winters...I am so ready for some sun! Don't get me wrong. Germany is beautiful...really beautiful...lots of lush and green. It was the first thing I noticed when we arrived the first time around in 1994. I soon realized it's all this wintry, drizzly weather that prepares that lush landscape. It's long, and it's cold, and it's gray. So, when we get those few beautiful days of real warm summer sunshine...enjoy them while you can. They are fleeting here.

So, I'm just realizing, when the weather is gray my mood is different, my energy is different...I think I'm just one of those people that thrive in the sunshine. Having grown up in California, I don't think I realized this before...that my moods could be tied to the weather. But, it's something that has been so reinforced here, especially lately...I'm so glad to be getting back to some sun! Kinda makes these last throes of winter a little more bearable...just a little. Come on spring!

Ugh...it's just sickly ol' me...

Ok, so you know that feeling of joy you get after childbirth, when you can finally feel semi-normal, climb out of bed without groaning and can't ever imagine feeling as bad as you recently have? That's me today.

No...didn't have any babies recently, but I liken it to the horrible flu I got this weekend. The one that left me in the bathroom every hour for 8 hours straight, then aching so bad the next day that my hair follicles hurt, and you couldn't pay me to get out of bed.

The part I feel really horrible about was the big District Pinewood Derby that Hayden was eligible for because he earned First Place out of the Webelos in our Pack Derby. You had to be present to race, and I couldn't find him a ride after 4 phone calls. I really feel like I let him down, but my head was literally spinning. I couldn't have driven the 1/2 hour to base to take him. He's been pretty understanding, but I know he's disappointed.

With Dennis gone, my kids were on their own...literally. Hayden and McKenna had "FREE FUN" weekend. As long as no major crashes occurred, I pretty much said "Yes" to whatever they asked for. Movies...Wii...computer...candy...more movies. He fixed lunch...Sabrina fixed dinner. All in all, I think they went through 9 packages of Top Ramen (although one of them was meant for me, when they brought me lunch in bed...that I immediately asked them to remove, but aren't they sweet?)

But, today...I'm getting some semblance of my life back. Plus a new appreciation for health and wellness...not to mention I lost about 6 lbs...so a good time to start a diet. But, I can't believe how feeling so bad can make you feel so good, when you finally get back there again. Back to where I am today...feeling like a million bucks, compared to yesterday!

McKenna's prayers

McKenna has begun to grow into her prayers. This was our prayer together the other night...


Me: Thank you for daddy.
Her: Thank you for daddy is coming home.

Me: Help me to sleep good.
Her: Help me to sleep good in my new bed.

Me: Help me to have a good day tomorrow.
Her: Help me to have a good day tomorrow and have fun.

Me: Help me to listen to mommy.
Her: Help me to listen to mommy while daddy's gone.

Ok, so it's good she's beginning to put her own thoughts into her prayers, but since when does she only have to listen to me until daddy comes home?

McKenna's new game...

So, McKenna came to me the other day and said Hayden taught her a new game...called "pick up." I'm half-way listening, so I give her the obligatory, "uh, huh..."

Then, she says, "with cards." That gets my attention...I just KNOW my son did not swindle his beloved baby sister into what I think she's talking about. So, I ask her, "52 card pick up?"

She says, "Yes, and it's fun!"

Ok, Hayden, you're off the hook...I guess if she's having fun, take the audience where you can get it. Just know, she won't always be so gullible...

EDIT: 22 March, I just got the short end of this new fun...she brought her cards in and tossed them, told me "It's pick up!" Of course, I refuse...and now have cards all over my bed and floor. It didn't take her long to figure out the "tossing" was the fun part of the game.

Flashing blue lights...

Ok, so have I mentioned I have this wierd kharma with cops whenever Dennis is deployed?

I took the kids to see Sugarland last night on Ramstein. They didn't have any food booths, just a beer kiosk that remained REALLY busy the entire time. So, I took them to eat at the bowling alley afterwards. It was about 10:15 when we pulled out of my parking spot, a parallel spot to the road, but being that late on base, there was NO ONE around. So, I pulled out...and kept going to the main road, where I turned left to head to the gate to exit base.

So, there have been a few times I've been pulled over in the past (I know, you're all aghast, saying "not Lisa, she's such a great driver!" Ok, you can stop laughing now...) and usually, I knew I was going a "little" fast.

But, there have been a few times when I was seriously shocked and sat there dumbfounded while the officer sauntered (yes, I said sauntered. Doesn't it always seem they are sitting back there eating lunch, purposely taking their time to make you stew?) up to my car. Last night was one of those times.

As I turned onto the main street, I'm driving along, ready to get home, when I see those dang flashing blue lights behind me. I even naively thought, "they must need to get around." But, no, as I pulled over, they stop behind me. Crud! Do I have an unlit tail light or something? He asked for the paperwork...license, registration, and ID.

It was at this point I'm still feeling a little high and mighty, so I asked, "What is it for?" (as I'm pulling out my ID's and registration...I'm bold, but not stupid!) He said, "You just went the wrong way on a one-way street." Dangit! He's right! I don't know what to say...see, the one-way I was on, met another one-way coming at me, and you are supposed to turn left before that. I know this...I've driven on that road for nearly 6 years...although coming from the other direction. So, I apologize profusely, admitting my oversight, and he lets me go. I think the 3 kids and lack of alcohol on my breath probably made him feel sorry for me, and he realized it wasn't going to be the big DUI collar he was expecting.

My bad...but I'll be so glad if I don't see those flashing lights in my rear view again for the next 2 months.

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly

I decided today, that very rarely do I have completely, horrible days...not like a few weeks ago. Not like one friend's experience to rent a car today. I do, however, have days with good things, bad things, and terribly ugly things that make me want to crawl back in bed and give up for the day.

So, for The Good: Today I checked out a dining set I've been looking at for several weeks on the German economy. It's in stock and on sale for 60 euro (just under $100) less right now.

The Bad: I opened my yogurt on the way to take McKenna to swim lessons, the one with an expiration date a week from now...and it was grainy and curdled. Yuck! No breakfast for me...

Also, we have been having trouble with Sabrina's on-site CGM (checks her blood sugar through her belly every 5 minutes) and made yet a 3rd attempt to get in touch with her endocrinologist's nurse. No dice...

The downright Ugly: As we were walking out the door to church tonight, Sabrina put my soda in my purse, not having noticed that I had already lifted the tab...half of my diet Coke with Lime pooled in the bottom of my month-old Vera Bradley that I love. Camera inside, cell phone, ipod, calculator...the next 15 minutes were spent doing damage control to save paper and electrical devices....not to mention my pretty Java Blue purse.

My day in a nutshell...look for future installments of The Good...The Bad...and The Ugly!

Hayden's first love...besides the internet

So, last night my 9 year old told me he wants Ashlyn (another 9 year old) to come to Hawaii....it seems a bit early, but with this cool dude, honestly, how could she resist?

Just some tidbits to share this week:

#1)
Hayden is my techie...he is in LOVE with the internet. He also is a big fan of SWAG...so to him anything he finds on the internet for free, really rocks his world. I am getting confirmation emails for free subscriptions to various kids' sites at least once a week. To him the internet is free entertainment, so he has spent some time creating his own website. It's linked to his school email somehow, and he is very proud of it. He has added some satellite maps so we can see where his dad is....or get close anyway.

So, last week he came to me and asked me if I had a paypal account. I was a little leery that my 9 year old is interested in my paypal account. He actually wanted me to tell him how he could get one. Why? I asked. So he can put a paypal button on his website, so people could send him money. I gave him a short economics lesson that people want a product or a service for giving you money. I asked what he was going to provide. About 3 days later...he came to me and said he figured it out...he was going to collect for the homeless. Short of the logistics of a 9 year old in general collecting for the homeless, I had to smile at my clever boy with a heart of gold...

#2) I've spent the majority of my life flying under the radar. And, yet I had two incidences with the police this week. (Why does this always happen when Dennis is deployed?) They seem harmless now, but I get seriously nervous when I even see the SP's coming into the food court to grab dinner. I can't figure out what I feel so guilty about.

So, on Saturday we went with some friends to dinner, and we rode together in our van. We had the youngest kids in the far back, Hayden, McKenna and their 3 year old, Ryan. After dinner we were going on base to get some ice cream. When you go through the gate, you have to show your ID to the guard or Security Police. So, while he's checking our ID's, the toddlers are working each other up...getting really excited about the "police," and Ryan starts shouting "Police! Police!" I swear he must have said it about 5 times...he really was excited...a 3 year old boy, police...who's surprised? Anyway, the guard starts looking at me, trying to peer in the back. And, finally asks me, "Is everything all right?" We were all laughing so hard...my cheeks hurt so much. all I could say was, "He's fine, he's 3..." Just the look on his face, I surely thought he was going to make us pull over and check it out.

Second, the last thing you want to do on a military installation is leave a package lying around. It instantly becomes a source of investigation, just short of sending the bomb squad. So, tonight I was packing groceries in the Volvo, rearranging in the back to fit it all in. From there we were going to Karate, so I took Hayden's karate duffel out of the trunk to easily get at later. I tossed it next to the car and called to the kids to put it inside. I finished fitting everything in and took off.

About an hour later we pulled into my cub scout leader meeting, and I asked Hayden to grab his bag and go change...what, no bag? Think back...crud!! Not only did I commit the cardinal sin, we were now on a different installation. So, I tried calling the commissary, and my fears were confirmed...the security police had the bag. I then had to call the Law Enforcement desk, admit my bungling, and ask pretty please to get the bag back. He told me they had "several" calls about it (Eagle Eyes program at work) had checked it out, and dropped it off at the youth center where they did karate. Unfortunately, being the wrong installation, it was the wrong karate class. 45 minutes later, I was able to retrieve the bag, but it required yet another trip to Ramstein today, and my son was 15 minutes late to his class.

This is my life...my quirky entrepreneur, boisterous kids, and running around like a chicken with my head cut off. Good thing they can't arrest you for that!